numbless:

don’t be too clingy
don’t be such a ‘girl’
be a woman
but be hairless like a child

don’t wear skimpy outfits
don’t be such a ‘slut’
be modest
but take it off when i ask

don’t assert yourself
don’t be such a ‘bitch’
be nice to me
but don’t be a fucking doormat

don’t be ignorant
don’t be such a ‘bimbo’
be intelligent
but don’t argue your opinion with me

don’t wear make-up ever
don’t be so ‘insecure’
be yourself
but don’t complain if i don’t like it

(Source: tamamuratamao)

His pledge to her:

i will kill the spiders. i will share my fries with you when you’ve finished all yours and are still hungry. i won’t ever pop my collar. i will never be rude to your tummy- when i hear it growl and gurgle. i promise to bend down and reply respectfully. i will eat the mushrooms when we order the supreme pizza. i will kiss the papercuts. and the door-slammed finger, and the counter-bumped hip. i’ll try my hardest not to get annoyed when you whisper questions and comments during movies. i will be the big spoon. i will let you win at wrestling, sometimes. other times i will not. i will go faster. harder. i will pull when you want. and tease you when you don’t. i will send you random texts and leave you silly gifts. not always. not on schedule. just whenever i want to. whenever i think you need one. or seven. i will check your tire pressure. and remind you to take your car in. i will hold your hand. i will love you.  i will love you. i will love you.

sskypages:

n-1d-forever-directioner:

cogsworthhasenteredthebuilding:

the-girl-who—lived:

whensocietykills:

ladymaxwell:

mulletsmakememoist:

never not reblog this ever

The one time Fox News does something okay.

This has to be on my blog a good 15 times. I regret nothing.

What a sassy republican.

reblogging for the sass and only the sass

(Source: dontgetcomfortable)

loganocchio:

nymeses:

evilfeminist:

treachherous:

mylovelybrighteyes:

Good job south campus. If only these were all over the place at school #rape #sexualassault #help #911

Completely true. The hospital didn’t make me do anything that I wasn’t comfortable doing.

Rainn.org is a great way to get help after trauma

I didn’t know any of this information. :( But I’m glad I know now!!!

Signal Boost!!

A word of advice

to those of you in new relationships or in a relationship that just took that next step… you know that spark? That excitement? How you just can’t wait for them to get home from work just to give them a big kiss? hold on to that. because it’s gone before you know it. a friend told me once you move in together it starts to die and she was right. fuck. relationships take work. a LOT of work. and don’t be all optimistic in your rose colored glasses and think “oh but that kind of work is FUN!” HAHAHAHAHAH aaaahhh ignorance. it’s not fun. it’s not easy. it’s a shit ton of hard ass work and sometimes it’ll feel like you’re trying WAY too fuckin hard for the shit that you get in return. and that’s where i’m at now. over a year of living together and we’re that cranky old couple that watches their shows and nit picks at the littlest things and argues over what fucking brand of toothpaste to buy. so before you get here, enjoy it. and when you get here, do your fucking best to not take your partner for granted because being on the other end of that fucking sucks.

we-are-star-stuff:

Who says North is up?

Upside Down maps (also known as South-Up or Reversed maps) offer a completely different perspective of the world we live in.

Technically speaking, even referring to the earth with words like “up” or “down” or comparing places with words “above” or “below” is flawed, considering that the earth is a spherical body (it’s actually slightly “fatter” at the equator) and flying through 3 dimensional space with no reference of up or down. However, the issue of “up” and “down” does become an issue when viewing the surface of the earth projected onto a flat piece of paper (a map). And the effect of the orientation of a map is more significant than you might realize.

As all maps require orientation for reference, the issue of how to layout the map orientation is as old as maps themselves. As map orientation is completely arbitrary, it is not surprising that they differed throughout time periods and regions.

The convention of North-up is usually attributed to the Egyptian astronomer Ptolemy (90-168 AD). Justifications for his north-up approach vary. In the middle ages, East was often placed at top. This is the origin of the term “The Orient” to refer to East Asia. During the age of exploration, European cartographers again followed the north-up convention…perhaps because the North Star was their fixed reference point for navigation, or because they wanted (subconsciously or otherwise) to ensure Europe’s claim at the top of the world.

In modern times, reversed maps are made as a learning device or to illustrate Northern Hemisphere bias. Different from simply turning a north-up map upside down, a reversed map has the text oriented to be read with south up.

The famous “Blue Marble” photograph of the Earth taken from on board Apollo 17 was originally oriented with the south pole at the top, with the island of Madagascar visible just left of center, and the continent of Africa at its right. However, the image was turned upside-down to fit the traditional view.

While the orientation of a map might seem harmless, it can have a significant effect on one’s perception of the world, and the relative importance of the different place in it.

In speech, we often refer to places being “above” or “below” others. Think of how you would say you’re about to travel to the state or country to your north or south (to go “down” to Kentucky from Indiana, or “up” to Canada from the US). Without even mentioning geography, ask any grade school student whether Mexico is “above” or “below” the United States. We’re all familiar with the “land down under”. As we often correlate importance to relative height (think how a citizens of a country will fly their flag higher than all other flags), the north-up convention reinforces the idea that northern bodies are more important than their southern neighbors. Suddenly, traveling “down” to the South might have an inference much deeper than geographic location.

After looking at the map more closely, you may realize that the South-Up orientation may change your perception of the relative status of different places. For example, South America suddenly looks to have more prominence, and Africa and the Middle East completely dwarf Europe. Likewise, tucking Northern Europe, Canada, and Russia away at the bottom of the map, subconsciously takes away their status.

To summarize, unconditionally accepting the north-up map convention without at least appreciating the effect stands at odds with viewing all people and places within the world equally. x x

(Source: catleecious)

(Source: andsewfortoday)

(Source: justlikedisney)

can’t stop crying. god i fucking hate this bullshit.

i’m so tired of you snapping at me out of nowhere when all i do is ask a question or try to help you in any way. when did you get so bitter?

wat.

(Source: astrodidact)

(Source: cute-overload)

thespacegoat:

• Accidentally close a tab? Ctrl+Shift+T reopens it.
• Bananas release dopamine, eat them when you’re sad.
• CTRL+SHIFT+ESC is the one handed version of CTRL+ALT+DEL
• Don’t brush your teeth hard, it makes them sensitive and removes enamel.
• Don’t like spiders? Put citronella oil on your walls and they will not go there.
• Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic drink you have, you’ll get drunk without getting a hangover.
• Get clear ice cubes by boiling water before freezing it
• Heal paper cuts and immediately stop the pain with chapstick.
• If you accidentally write on your dry erase board with a permanent marker, scribble over it with a dry eraser marker to remove it.
• If your shoes smell, put them in the freezer overnight, it will kill the bacteria. 
• Make bug bites stop itching with a banana peel.
• Make a paper longer with 12-point text, but 14-point periods and commas.
• Need to get around a blocked website at work? Try replacing the http:// with https://
• Never send your resume as a word file (unless asked) Instead, save it to a pdf file, it’s much cleaner and professional looking.
• Pick a flavor of gum you don’t normally chew, and chew it while studying during a test.
• Place a piece of bread in a container with your homemade cookies and  they will stay soft.
• Put a dry towel into a dryer with wet clothes, they will dry faster.
• Put toothpaste on a pimple and it will dry out.
• Practise fake smiling in the mirror every day before going to work/school, you’ll genuinely start to feel happier.
• Rub canola/olive oil on knives before cutting onions, you won’t cry, alternatively chew gum and you won’t either.
• Short on time with a wrinkled dress shirt? Hang it up in the bathroom while showering to steam it flat.
• The night before, place things you don’t want to forget the next morning on top of your shoes.
• Use hydrogen peroxide to remove blood stains from clothing.
• When cleaning windows use newspapers or coffee filters instead of paper towels, they will not leave streaks.
• When microwaving bread products/pizza put a glass of water in with it, it will keep your bread from going spongy.
• When you move into a new place you’re renting, take pictures of any and all damage, then post them on facebook (privately if preferred) so you can use the reference date as proof you didn’t do it.
• When searching plane tickets online delete your cookies prior, prices go up when you visit a site multiple times.

ireallyhatecornnuts:

schim:

chinad011:

pineapplebananacurry:

cookingformorons:

greencarnations:

How to make your ramen 9001x better, courtesy of /ck/

And you can buy roast beef and roast chicken on the internet. I am set for ramen for like a year now.

QUICK EGG IN UR RAMEN TRICK MY FRIEND TAUGHT ME IN HIGH SCHOOL

pour just enough water into your pot to cover your noodles and other ingredients, then get a small cup/fancy measuring 1 cup cup or w/e and measure out another cuppa watta. dump that shit in too.

make ur ramen. just start boiling and dump whatever you’re supposed to put in in the beginning. u know how to make ramen this isn’t ramen for snot nosed sobbing beginners ok

KEY PART: you know how it says on the back of the package to cook for about 4-5 minutes?? we’re cooking for 5 minutes. wait for your ramen to cook for the first three minutes. stare hungrily if you must. but the EXACT MOMENT 3 minutes hit here’s what you do:

1. SCREAM. and then stir your noodles to make sure nothing is sticking to the bottom of the pot. (scream is optional) also make sure your broth is still more or less covering your noodles, if its not add a bit more. it doesn’t matter if some is still sticking up we just don’t want chewy noodles (unless you’re into that) (i’m into that)
2. make a lil hole in your noodles. this little hole must have broth in it and nothing more. make it in the middle or the side it honestly doesn’t matter you just need a clear shot to the bottom of the pot
3. crack your egg and toss that mother into the hole.
4. COVER EGG WITH NOODLES AS QUICK AS YOU CAN
5. DON’T. STIR.
6. I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU STIR FOR THE REMAINING MINUTE AND A HALF YOU probably won’t ruin anything you’ll just have egg drop soup i guess but IF YOU DON’T STIR
7. Congratulations, you have poached an egg in your broth! Your poached egg now tastes like your ramen broth. Revel in your victory.
8. no seriously that egg will be mildly chewy deliciousness oh my god if you can perfect this technique you will never have your egg in your ramen another way again

this is as close as you’ll get to ramen made in a restaurant…

I’m just glad this isn’t like that one post that was all “HOW TO EAT CHEAP WITH RAMEN STEP ONE ADD A SIRLOIN STEAK AND $20 WORTH OF INGREDIENTS”.

This is how you can tell I’m poor as fuck.

Most dried ramen is deep-fried which is why it’s so unhealthy. If you boil in plain water, strain, and then add to fresh hot water/broth, it’s a lot better for you in general.

Another recipe:

Boil your noodles. Strain. Take a small frying pan and melt two tablespoons of butter (margarine works but butter is better) on low heat. Add the noodles and flavor powder and mix well. 

ANOTHER recipe:

Get a bag of frozen stir-fry veggies from wal-mart. It’s like a buck fifty. Fry those suckers up with some tonkatsu sauce or soy sauce. Boil your ramen, strain. Pile the noodles on a plate, top with your veggies and sauce. Sprinkle a tiny bit of the ramen flavoring on top. Bam, stir fry. The veggies make enough to serve three people (three packages of ramen).

Other things you can add to ramen to make it taste better:

Chopped inarizushi.

A half a can of peas.

A half a can of tunafish to the shrimp kind.

CHIVES MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER.

Oddly enough, boiled potatoes to the beef kind.

Shredded cabbage.

Sliced boiled eggs. 

Matchstick carrots (you can get them from most grocery stores for like a dollar a package; alternately make your own from a cheap-ass bag of whole carrots).

If you’re gluten-free, you can make a gluten-free version of ramen by making and preparing spaghetti squash and using the bullion recipe above (substitute anything with gluten in it for something without, obviously). The “noodles” are smaller but damn is it tasty. Spaghetti squash, incidentally, grows at the least provocation so if you get a spaghetti squash (which are generally kind of expensive), save the seeds and plant them anywhere. Water them once a day. 

Spring-noodle soup, courtesy my husband’s Asian-American ex-girlfriend: Boil your ramen and strain. Heat up a can of soup broth, or simply prepare the ramen bullion. Dip the noodles into the broth forkful by forkful as you eat. You can add other stuff to the noodles, like veggies and meat, as you’re boiling it.

Saute some green onions and minced garlic in a pan in butter or margarine for a few minutes (you can substitute sesame oil for the butter or margarine  as well, if you happen to have it around. The sesame oil gives it a really good flavor). Add a dash of seasoned salt. Boil and strain your ramen noodles. Add to the saute mix, fry for a hot second, and you have awesome garlic noodles. 

Minute rice! You can add a small handful of minute rice to your ramen as it’s cooking for a more carb-heavy soup to get you through the day. If you couple this with veggies and meat it’s almost a round meal.

THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH RAMEN, but if you make macaroni and cheese (Kraft dinner), add a can of tunafish and a half a can of peas to it to make a more filling, more rounded meal. 

Seriously, if you are broke and need to vary your diet in any way, I am the person to talk to. I grew up on this shit. A lot of is really unhealthy, but at least you won’t die of boredom.

why the hell did i never think of any of this